To continue the Perils of Susie, I painted yesterday. Once settled in a new home you begin to notice both its highlights and shortcomings. Somewhat like being in a new relationship, caught in the throes of infatuation little things often get overlooked at first observation. With this house there were several thumbs down on a list with many, many thumbs up. One slight negative is the washer and dryer are situated on the lower floor. I don’t mind, it’s good exercise climbing up and down the stairs, but they are in the hall between the two spare bedrooms with no place to fold the clothes. Surveying the area, I came up with an idea. Like Lucy, my ideas do not always go as planned, but this one was a keeper. Passing the idea on to a contractor helping us with some things needing to be fixed, he took it and ran with it. A rectangular piece of wood with a hinged leg that would fold up against the wall and secure when not in use. Voila. $40 later it was up and running, however remained unpainted.As you can see by my cave drawing below, Frank Lloyd Wright is not turning over in his grave at being bested in design, but it works and I don’t have to fold clothes on the bed or on top of the drawer, so I’m happy.
Sooooo, Susie took herself to Home Depot and purchased a small pot of paint, a wee roller and trough, and a brush. Rick in his favorite easy chair was lost in an afternoon of dreams of his niners going to the Super Bowl. I taped the painter’s tarp to cover the surrounding areas. It certainly would have been easier to paint if still apart, but it was a small project after all, so should come together quickly.
At any rate, I threw on an old tee shirt with bees all over the front (my nemesis as you might know) and an old pair of shorts. Down into the belly of the house I went, armed with my brush and roller. After surveying the project, I decided to start with the underside first, or when the table is in the “up” position. Easy peasy. I pulled up the table and secured the pin, and poured some paint in the trough. Finding the roller smoother than the brush and easier, I went with that. Working around the leg in the middle was a pain and soon I had paint on my hands. Unaware the rolling motion was jiggling the pin in the hinge securing the table, I continued down the board bending to reach the bottom. One last roll shook the board free from the hinge slamming it soundly down on my head fresh paint and all. The cat lying on the floor next to me, definitely cashed in a life on this one. Not only did a lovely circle of stars form in front of my face, but because I was facing down, thankfully, wet paint was slathered all over the back of my hair. Damn the concussion, my hair was painted. Oh-oh.
Panicked, I headed towards the bathroom leaving a trail of clothes in my wake. Rick, awakened by the noise and seeing the splotched project and line of discarded clothing, sprinted in the bathroom at a pace I haven’t seen him attain since the last time I served liver and onions. Offering the Reader’s Digest explanation, I stuck my head under the tap. He shook his head. Sigh, that again. Under the hot water I shampooed and rinsed twice praying I wasn’t going to still be Ivory Bisque when I got out. A goose egg any mother goose would be proud of sprouted across my crown. Toweled off and clothed, Rick checked my head for damage. He suggested we call in a phrenologist to read my bump and determine why I do such incredibly stupid things.
In the middle of the night I woke up to giggling on the other side of the bed. Yes, I said giggling, a grown man. It seems the more he thought about what I’d done the sillier it got. At least I contribute some comic relief to the relationship.
He checked me several times during the night to see if I was speaking in tongues or unresponsive. Since I’m sitting here typing this undeniably stupid story about myself and sharing it with you, the jury is still out on whether or not my head suffered permanent damage. To loosely quote Kelly Lebrock, “don’t hate me because I’m stupid”.
Today I will repair my mess, but I’m one step ahead of the game because I’m going in in full military gear, pith helmet in place.
I have to tell you this was great “jam”. I hesitated to make it because I wasn’t sure it sounded like I’d like it. Bacon, however, can make even liver taste good, so I gave it a shot. Yum, I say. I intended to make the sandwich, take the picture, and give it to Rick but after one bite I ate the whole thing and had to create another.
Breakfast Sandwich with Bacon Jam
l lb. bacon, chopped
1 large onion, diced
4 cloves garlic, minced
3/4 cup ale
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
3 Tbsp. pure maple syrup (I used pure Canadian)
4 Tbsp. chili sauce
salt and pepper
4 English muffins
4 fried eggs
Salt and pepper
In large skillet cook bacon until crisp. Set aside.
Drain on paper towels, reserving 1 Tbsp. of grease in pan.
Add onion and garlic to grease in pan. Cook over med. heat about 10 mins. until onion is translucent.
Add ale, apple cider vinegar, maple syrup and chili sauce to pan. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low and simmer for 35-40 mins. until thick and bubbly. Add bacon and season with salt and pepper.
Spread a spoonful on bottom of toasted and buttered English muffin. Top with fried egg and another spoonful of “jam” on top. Place top of English muffin over all.