Last week I opened a bag of baby spinach, and while washing it found a four-leaf clover nestled amongst the leaves. Soon afterward my palm began to itch profusely. While getting dressed for the day, to my surprise I discovered a well washed $20 bill in the pocket of my shorts. Seeming to continue my vein of good luck, my daily horoscope predicted a fruitful day fraught with unexpected financial rewards. Truthfully any financial reward would be unexpected and positively overflowing with fraught. Sure enough, a rebate check for $87.00 appeared in the afternoon mail. Signs pointing undeniably toward good fortune, I was spurred on to purchase $10 worth of lottery tickets. Amazingly, not one number on my quick picks matched those drawn Saturday night. My precognitive powers are a very well disguised gift. Sigh. Despite feeling very lucky for the bounty of gifts life has provided me thus far, in the literal Irish sense of the word I am not a naturally “lucky” person.
Four years ago or thereabouts I added my name to other hopeful contestants vying for their turn on the Wheel of Fortune. The way Murphy toys with my affections, my name most likely will be chosen two days after they’ve published my eulogy and blown out the candles. Things happen that way for me. If there were thirty prizes in a drawing and only one other person’s name tossed in the hat to win them besides my own, the closest I would get to those prizes would be helping the winner load all thirty in their trunk. Just the way it is. Really annoying to me are those individuals who, despite staggering odds, repeatedly win the lottery, or take home huge payoffs at the casinos more than once in a lifetime. I will always be that person who got up from the winning slot machine five minutes before it hit to use the facilities.
Speaking of Wheel of Fortune, I would like Vanna’s job when she’s through with it. For identifying the illuminated letters in the puzzle and being an excellent clothes mannequin, she brings in about $1,000,000 annually. Chump change by standards set by such as Charlie Sheen who brought that and more home per episode on Two and a Half Men, but my bank account would welcome all those extra zeroes with unbridled enthusiasm. I’m confident I could handle her position. My pointing finger remains fully functional, and I believe I can still manage to walk across a stage in heels while smiling at the same time. Don’t misunderstand me, I’m not diminishing Vanna’s part in the success of the show. She is an icon in her world and pairs beautifully with Pat Sajak. I can appreciate the effort it takes to breathe life into inane dialogue on a minor level, and have great admiration for actors who do voice overs or those oh-so-perky product pitchers who make the dull seem magical. At one time I dated an amateur documentary and commercial film maker. While creating a vacation spot promoting tourism on the Florida coast for a travel consultant, he needed a female voice to say, “Come to Florida, any way you can”. (Go ahead, try it.) The scene I was speaking to was a man dressed as Superman circling high above the Florida Keys. After 400 takes, we finally got a usable line of soundtrack with my voice. Somewhere, someday you may find yourself viewing a commercial of the man of steel soaring over Key Largo with a cheery girl instructing you to get there any way you can, and say to yourself, “why, I bet that’s Susie”. My fifteen minutes of fame. In particular, I like the travel perks provided in her line of work. Travel is the only thing missing for me in my world at the moment and likely what I would do with any substantial found money. Standing before a sparkling pool at Sandal’s Resort with my palm up saying “This could be you, if you win the prize puzzle”, is totally doable for me.
I have a friend who truly was born under a lucky star. Like Midas, everything she touches turns to gold. Once we went to an ATM in Southern California so she could withdraw money for a day of shopping. Inserting her ATM card she pushed the button indicating $60 cash withdrawal. Dollar bills began feeding through the slot like she’d tapped into the mother lode. Amassing nearly $300 we alerted the tellers inside who rectified the situation by taking it all back and reporting the machine malfunction. Had that been my card, my card either would have gotten stuck in the machine slot or the computerized system would have deducted more money than I’d requested from my account and neglected to feed any bills through the slot. I’m just sayin.
Alternately, I have a male friend who if it wasn’t for bad luck would have no luck at all, particularly when it comes to vehicles and women. Whether he purchased a new car on Tuesday, Wednesday, or Thursday for him it always ended up being a Monday or Friday car. Once he parked his brand new car across the street from a lake to buy a bottle of water at a gas station. Returning with his purchase he watched as his last view of the rear bumper disappeared beneath the murky water.
Perhaps its Karma, or as simple as a little black cloud like in L’il Abner seeming to follow some people. Women, also proved disastrous. He stepped up to the altar only once, many, many years ago. Since then, as he puts it, “I’ve decided not to purchase but to rent”. His girl of choice was absolutely lovely to look at but had a disposition which would have made Leona Helmsley appear to be a walk in the park. A high maintenance kind of gal, she insisted on an elaborate wedding. Tens of thousands of dollars were allotted for rings, flowers, venue, dresses, etc., with the finale being a magnificent honeymoon encompassing both Australia and New Zealand. Four days after they returned tanned and refreshed, she left him driving off in the Porsche he’d given her for a wedding present.
So, I am keeping the four-leaf clover in the flower pot on the sink, but will continue making my own luck until I find myself buying vowels with Pat and Vanna. Garage sale this weekend so busy day ahead for me getting ready. These scallops were good. I liked the mix of flavors between the salt of the prosciutto and the sweet of the orange sauce.
Prosciutto Wrapped Grilled Scallops with Orange Sauce
16 scallops, feet removed
8 slices prosciutto, halved lengthwise
Salt and pepper
1/4 tsp. hot paprika
1/2 cup orange marmalade
3 Tbsp. freshly squeezed lime juice
1 tsp. red pepper flakes
Salt to taste
Mix sauce ingredients and refrigerate until ready to use.
Grill 4 mins. per side or until opaque over med-high heat.
Top with orange sauce.