We are smack in the middle of no-man’s land, how I refer to the days spanning the gap between Christmas and New Years. All the hype and excitement of Thanksgiving and Christmas are behind us for another year. Turkey has been eaten, gifts have been exchanged, family has come and often gone, and life has once again has begun to settle back into the routine it held prior to Halloween.
One holiday, or really two if you count New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day, remains on the calendar. New Year’s Eve has never made a good memory for me, finding me either nursing a champagne head over eggs Benedict at some pricey hotel affair or simply ensconced in general catastrophe. Even if I was thinking about making plans they would definitely include an Uber driver. People get crazy on the roads, downing alcohol like the drink in front of them will be the last alcoholic beverage to be served to them before their demise. Because of this track record, I prefer to stay home hunkered down with whatever the TV offerings might be allowing the new year to show up without giving it much fanfare. This year, however, marks not only the last gasp for 2019 and the first breath for 2020 but the entrance into a new decade. No matter how festive this might be, this time of year is remains an introspective period for me. I find I don’t know quite what to do with myself. This is an unusual and rather unsettling state of being for me as I am a person who is rarely lacking in ways to occupy my time. It is not that there aren’t twenty things I could entertain myself doing or many things needing my attention, it’s just that I don’t seem to want to do any of them. The after Christmas let down as the last of the Christmas ornaments are boxed up and returned to the shed, and the twinkling lights no longer decorate the eaves of the house contributes to his state of malaise, I would suppose. Sometimes I wish we could just leave the tree up all year. Perhaps though, if we were to enjoy Christmas year round it wouldn’t hold the enchantment it does when visiting us only once.
As I’ve mentioned my tree goes up the day after Thanksgiving barring war or pestilence, and comes back down the day after Christmas unless I am being held captive by a rogue band of aliens. Along with the many other little nuances of personality continuing to show up, being unable to tolerate looking at the decorations any more than one day past Christmas can be added to the list. Don’t ask me why. Faulty wiring most probably. Why not? I blame my wiring for everything else I can’t explain about me. Books will be written.
Along with my gifts from Santa I got a cold. Remind me to write him a thank you. That’s what I get for eating his cookies before I went to bed. It is one of those colds that doesn’t leave you tucked under the covers in bed surrounded by a field of used Kleenex but rather one of those sapping all your energy and leaving your nose looking like you’ve been dipping it in the deep fryer. Naturally I was going to a holiday party last evening. Well sort of a holiday football party. Fully suited in my 49er sweatshirt and hoodie I was determined to root my team on no matter what. I alerted my hosts I was harboring a bug, but they insisted I show up anyhow stating three fourths of the guests were dealing with something or other this time of year. I suggested I paint bugs on pieces of paper and tape them to the sufferers backs. That way the carriers would be obvious to those not yet afflicted and a safe distance could be maintained. She seemed to feel this was over the top since people frequent stores, church, have children (the little germ magnets), and families so are exposed to germs every time they leave the house. Okay, I tried. Turns out she was right. Tissue boxes were as prevalent as acne on teenagers with everyone happily incubating germs in their lovely warm house cheering our team to a tight and nerve wracking victory against the Seattle Seahawks. YAY. Rick loved the 49ers. They were not making a great showing before he died but he sat in his chair and rooted them on every week. I’m sure he’s tap dancing on a cloud right night watching them go into the playoffs.
So, I turn my thoughts to the new year. I don’t make resolutions as a rule. Instead I choose to set goals and make a personal promise to do my best to achieve them. Definitely getting a job would be at the top of my list. Yes, yes perhaps the holiday season would have been the ideal time to pursue one. Nobody likes a nag. It’s not like I’m dragging my feet on this. Well, perhaps it’s exactly like I’m dragging my feet. It’s been a while and I’m getting riper by the day. Worries me about moving back into the work force as an older woman. Makes me feel a bit like the gray whiskered dog at the pet shop competing with all the puppies. My skills are still sharp, or I like to think they are, but I certainly cannot compete with younger candidates in the candles on my cake category. I will hold positive thoughts and believe in myself and get a JOB. There you go, my affirmation for the day.
I want to explore filling my days with new and interesting experiences. Fitness is on my mind. The thought hasn’t traveled to my limbs as yet nor to the hand that picks up my phone and calls the fitness center but it’s moving in that direction. Though I walk every day, my doctor tells me my bone density needs work so work out I must whether my mind is fully on board with the thought or not.
There are lessons to be learned from all that we experience in our lives. If nothing else from the last few years I have taken with me each day needs to be treated with respect. Life can change instantly and the time to take that trip, enroll in that course, or tell someone you love them is now. Sooooo, we take a tentative step into 2020. With all that is swirling around us in the news it should prove if nothing else to be an interesting one. See you in the new year. Have a safe holiday.
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