This promises to be a more than mildly interesting month. On the 20th, our new president will step up to the podium for the first time in his new role. This week, our sitting president was impeached for the second time, making him the first president for the history books to receive such an honor. The scent of change lingers in the air, commingled with the unsettling murmurs of unrest. On the 6th of this month, citizens of the United States laid siege to the capital building for the purpose of attacking their fellow Americans, resulting in the loss of five lives. Covid-19 still rules the teleprompters at the news centers with people succumbing to it in record numbers. 2020, to most people’s minds a year of firsts and uneven lines, may have nothing on 2021.
There is a lot of information floating around in our world at the moment. Conspiracy theories are blowing up among the far right fueled by bad intel fed by people in positions of trust. The recent uprising in Washington D.C. highlights how quickly information can be spread, be it truth or lies, with the technology available to almost everyone these days. Distorted or tweaked information can move across the nation at lightning speed, changing and morphing depending on who is passing it on and in what direction their general belief structure might lean. Let’s face it, what you want to hear, generally is the easiest news to accept.
All this twisted truth reminds me of a game we used to play as kids. Seated in a large circle, one person was selected to go first. They whispered a sentence of their choosing in the ear of whoever was seated next to them. In turn, that person passed on what they heard to the next person, and so on. When it reached the person last in line, they repeated aloud what they had heard. The more people in the circle, the more distorted the original message tended to become. How much the intent of the original statement changed by the time it was repeated by the last player, always surprised me.
Gossip moves along at warp speed as well. As it moves along the information highway passing from one friend or associate to another, it grows and shifts from the original story depending on the person sharing the story and their point of view. There’s positive tale telling. For example, “Did you hear Penelope’s daughter got married? I hear the ceremony was just beautiful.” As always there are two sides to the coin. If there is positive, stands to reason there will be negative. People’s lives have been virtually destroyed by people spreading malicious or untrue information about them. Gossip is an insidious undertaking. Conspiratol in nature, it usually gets going when one person is chosen as the target for several peoples wagging tongues. It may be based on fact, it may be based on perception, or lastly, it could be fabricated ideas springing forth from a person’s imagination. Whether one, two, or three of the above is true, often it can prove hurtful for the person being talked about and always it reflects on the character of those doing the talking. Now, I’m not going to say I have never gossiped. If I did, you would probably be shaking your heads saying “Come on, Susie. We know better”. I don’t like to gossip, but sometimes I get drawn into a story or pass one on when I would be better served just to keep my nose firmly centered in my own business rather than sniffing about in others. My daughter always tells me I’m no fun to gossip with. Usually I defend the person being talked about, or don’t participate with enough enthusiasm to make it entertaining for the other parties.
Gossip can be simple simple neighborhood stuff, fairly innocent in nature. The sort of offhand comments one might hear said, say, after church service, from one person to the next. Things like, “Did you see the dress Sharon had on today? They really shouldn’t use bold prints on larger sizes.” If Sharon heard that comment she might have her feelings hurt or even get rid of the dress. If she knew the source of the comment she might choose to avoid the ladies who said it. Most of the time this type of gossip doesn’t do significant damage. Lately in our country, however, we are slinging insults and meanness around like it was a free for all. The truth is manipulated according to how it will serve the person saying it. Seems like there are no boundaries any more as to what we will do or say in the name of country. Our moral compass has gone askew and the leaders in government have become so divided. Left unguided by the powers that be, it leaves our lives seeming to lack direction and without a clear understanding of which direction we are headed. It reminds me of the atrocities during the middle ages perpetuated by powerful men in the name of the church. Very little “Christian” behavior was exhibited during the so called holy wars.
I always told my children, “Be careful what you say. Words are powerful tools. Once you wield them, you cannot take them back.” This includes the written word. When you commit your words to paper, email, text, social media, wherever, they become part of the fabric. You cannot remove the stitches and start over again. Apologies are helpful, but when it comes to a grave situation such as is occurring in our nation’s capitol now, just saying “I’m sorry” doesn’t really erase the debt.
Being responsible for your actions is at the top of my list. If you have done something, own it. It is yours and all the finger pointing, diversion, and avoiding it does make it any less so. I remember when my son was small I took him with me into a convenience store while I picked up a couple of things I needed. When we walked up to the cashier, I handed the man behind the counter my items. After ringing the items up he said, “Is that all?”. I nodded my head in the affirmative. Then he said, “I don’t think so”. I had no idea what the man was talking about. He pointed to my little boy standing at my side. A very red and embarrassed face looked back up at me. What? “Check his pockets”, the man went on. My son, turning his pockets out, handed me about 6 packages of chewing gum with baseball cards he had apparently liberated from the store’s shelves. Oh-oh. I told the man I would pay for the pilferage and he added the cards to my bag. Once outside, my son and I stood at the trash can and opened each package and deposited the contents one by one into the bin. In the car, I told him he would pay for the cards out of his allowance until he had paid for them in full. He always remembered that lesson.
It’s so easy to look at other people’s behavior and point a finger or consider yourself right and them wrong. At this point I think it is paramount to figure out how to include more than one way to win the game in the playbook and come to some sort of middle ground while cohabiting in this large and diverse country. Personally, I think we need to reboot the United States much in the same way you would a TV or a computer. Go back, slow down the rhetoric, and reduce the steam coming out of the pot. Bang the drum slowly.
My thoughts for a Friday. Make it a safe one. I will go back to my usual writing now, but I felt like everyone involved in this craziness right now either becomes part of the solution, or remains part of the problem.
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