As usual I continue to find myself in the most ridiculous situations. I was hoping the advent of 2015 would have me acting in a more respectable manner, but it seems to be simply an extension of last year.
Rick’s daughter is getting married as I mentioned. The celebration is in Phoenix. A dress or semi-formal attire of some sort is in order, so I’ve been shopping. Along my shopping route I stopped at a major department store advertising a huge sale. Not being the only one with this idea, the parking was lot packed. My style of shopping, if you can call it that, is to gather as much as I can carry the first trip through the store thus making as few trips back and forth to the dressing room as is necessary. As you might gather, shopping is not my idea of a good time. Along with a new dress I needed a pair of jeans. Finding several pairs I liked, I piled them on top of everything else. Trying the jeans on first, one pair needed a smaller size. Still wearing the store jeans to avoid having to change again, I grabbed my purse, and went out to look for the size I needed. Closing the door to safeguard my room, I left my glasses, the jeans I’d worn into the store and everything I’d picked out to try on in the dressing room. Easy peasey.
Walking back to the fitting rooms with the correct size I found a line had formed. Oh-oh. Sliding along the side of the line towards my dressing room as I approached the door I heard the lock click shut. Whoops. Now I’m dressed in store jeans with tags dangling beneath my shirt. The oversized jeans kept slowly moving south on my body. This resulted in my looking like one of those kids who insists on wearing his pants with the crotch hovering somewhere around his knees as if his underwear was meant to be the focal point of his attire. As I moved to the front of the line pulling the pants up with each step I ushered the women behind me to go ahead. The lady in my dressing room must have had half the store to try on because at least ten minutes passed. Ach. Pants nearly around my ankles I finally knocked and explained the situation to a voice behind the door. Several ladies behind me began to chuckle. Yes, yes, I know. I left my “I’m with Stupid” tee-shirt in the wash. A shirt I feel I’m entitled to wear even without a companion. Kind enough to open the door the woman inside and I had to rifle through the pile of clothes to find mine mixed in with hers and my pants and glasses. Sigh.
Leaving the store carrying my purchases free range as I’d forgotten my reuseable bags as usual, I headed toward an appointment at the podiatrist. This was to be my virgin visit to such a specialist. Even at the height of their glory my feet were never my finest asset. Someone in my family told me as a youngster my great grandmother’s feet were 12 AAA. Surely not. I had nightmares about those long skinny appendages for months. If she’d ever abandoned her nursing career she could have signed on immediately with the ski patrol without requiring any additional equipment. Not that I’m complaining about my piggies. Without them I would have been staring at the ground most of my life. Certainly though there was never a threat of my being lured away from my day job to make big money as a foot model. As a matter of fact, my other half tells me to keep my socks in place lest I traumatize young children. Lately, if possible, they have transformed into an even less palatable visage. My toenails once pristine have now turned a rather unpleasant shade of ecru. I was assuming this to be some sort of treatable situation like foot fungus, ewwwwwwwwww, but nonetheless.
Sitting in the doctor’s office alongside people with medical boots, casts, and crutches, my slightly yellow toenails seemed somehow less important. Ushered into a room a doctor bustled in shortly and asked me to remove my shoes and socks and hop up on the examining table. After a cursory look at my jaundiced nails, he confirmed my diagnosis. Fungus, most likely a result of taking antibiotics. Ach. Apparently a gift that keeps on giving, once you get it it likes to stick around. That’s nice. I assume a pedicure is out of the question? According to the podiatrist topical remedies for this surprisingly common occurrence currently on the market are of little if no use. There are medications you can take orally that might help, but in the end once a fungus always a fungus it would appear. Perhaps I’ll have to have healthy toenails tattooed on so I can go out in my summer shoes. My girlfriend told me to soak the toes in vinegar and water. What have I got to lose? I’ll update you if this has any effect other than making my lower extremities smell like the far end of a salad bar.
On the way home after that delightful piece of news about my feet I hit a deer. This has never happened to me before. First and foremost the idea of hurting any living thing left me saddened and shaking. Unfortunately, there was little I could do for the animal as it ran off into the trees after I clipped it. Moving at around 60 mph it rocked the car pretty good and tossed what left of my grey cells around a bit. On the right front side of the car there are several plastic pieces askew but other than that no other major visible damage. The deer, one might hope, either died quickly or somehow survived the ordeal and isn’t in pain. However with the intensity of the impact, I’m doubting the latter. I’m telling you, I’m going into my closet with a bag of fiery Cheeto’s and a jug of margaritas and shutting the door tight for the day!
It’s been a helluva day at sea I’m just sayin’.
Brussels sprouts remain at the top of my “list of favorite veggies”. They cohabit with so many other vegetables beautifully. In particular I like them done this way.
Oven Roasted Spicy Brussels Sprouts and Carrots
6 small carrots, peeled cut in large chunks
15 Brussels sprouts, trimmed
1/2 lb. pearl onions, peeled
3 Tbsp. olive oil
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. black pepper
1/4 tsp. lemon pepper
1/2 tsp. ground cumin
1/2 tsp. ground coriander
1/4 tsp. chili powder
1/8 tsp. cayenne pepper
1/8 tsp. ground ginger
1/4 tsp. hot paprika
Preheat oven to 400 degrees.
Heat medium saucepan full of hot water to boiling. Drop onions in boiling water for 2 mins. Remove with slotted spoon and immediately drop in bowl of ice water. This makes the onions easy to peel.
Boil carrots and Brussels sprouts together until tender but not fully cooked. Drain. Boil onions separately in small saucepan of water until tender but not fully cooked.
Spray casserole dish with cooking spray. Place vegetables in large bowl. Mix all seasonings together and sprinkle on top. Add olive oil. Toss to cover well. Place in prepared dish and bake for 30 mins. turning once.